Midnight Confession

by R.A. Torrey

The members of the board looked at me in amazement. “Do you mean to tell us,” one man finally choked out, “that you want us to end our financial support of your project? That you don’t want our financial backing for your family, or even for the missionaries you employ?”

The knob on the board member’s throat worked up and down in a peculiar fashion as he spoke. “Are you saying that you plan to continue your work without a salary, without an allowance, without taking up any collections, and without asking for money in any way?”


I nodded. “Yes. I do not believe that God asks every man to work this way, or even that He asks the same man to always do so. However, I am positive that God wants me, at this time, to go forward in this way. I plan to look to Him, through prayer, to furnish the money needed for this work.”

And so, in a single day, I cut off every source of income I had in the world. From then on, every penny that came for the support of my ministry came in answer to prayer.

And the money came: day after day, week after week, and month after month. Sometimes it came in small amounts; sometimes in large. Often it arrived in ordinary ways, and sometimes under very extraordinary circumstances. But it came.

Then one day it did not come. I had heavy obligations, and no money to meet them. That evening I again took the matter to God in prayer. “Lord,” I prayed, “send me that money, not just so the work can go on, but that Your name might be glorified.” But I went to bed with no peace.

In the middle of the night I awoke in great pain. “Lord,” I cried, “touch my body and heal me! And send the money we need!” But no answer came. To my troubled mind, it seemed as though the heavens were brass—that there was no God above. Again I cried out to God, and again I received no answer. Finally I cried out, “Heavenly Father, if there is anything wrong in my life anywhere, show me what it is and I will give it up.”

Instantly God brought something to my mind that had often troubled me. Each time it had come up before I had told myself, That’s all right. I know it’s all right. There is nothing wrong about it. Now it came to my mind so vividly that I prayed, “Oh God, if this thing is wrong in Thy sight, I will give it up now.”

I received no answer. At last I cried, “Oh God, this thing is wrong; it is sin. I give it up now.” Instantly God touched my body and the pain was gone. In the next few days, the money came in and the work went on.

When was God able to answer my prayer? When I admitted my sin and gave it up.

How about you? Are you praying for something and not getting it? If so, do not imagine that God does not answer prayer; do not decide that He does not want to grant your request. It may be that God is trying to bring you to your senses and to Himself. Take time to be alone with God. Honestly ask Him to show you if there is anything wrong in your heart or life—anything that is displeasing to Him. When He shows you, set it straight at once. Then you will find an open Heaven and a God whose ear is quick to hear your prayers.